Clean...

Yesterday I got home an hour early... I didn't realize what I could get done in an hour! Every since I miscarried I have done the minimal around the house. I've kept up the laundry and picked up messes, but that's about it. It has also drove me insane that I had no energy to do anything else. So yesterday with my extra hour before Ryan & Brycen got home, I cleaned. I cleaned like a banshee really. I dusted, I vacummed, I swept the hard wood and tile floors, and I mopped those. I scrubbed the kitchen sink, I cleaned the bathrooms, and I decluttered Brycen's toy room. (okay the bathrooms and decluttering the toy room, piled over into the time after Ryan had picked up Brycen and came home!) But still! I was so glad I got all this done. I also got Brycen's summer clothes washed up (since we're leaving in TWO days for the beach!). Then I still had the energy to make supper. (just spaghetti and breaksticks, but so what, I cooked it!). Today is two weeks since I started spotting. It feels like a life time ago some moments, but at others it feels like yesterday. I'm still struggling, but I'm living. I'm making the most of all the time I have with Brycen, and trying to see the joy in what he sees the joy in! He's so excited about leaving for Fla. we have been counting down the number of times we have to sleep until we can leave! And if I want to be honest, I'm just about as excited as he is! Now for the packing.... um haven't even started! I made a list last night of everything (i think i have everything on the list?) that we need to pack... But as for starting to pack.... um no. I have ZERO, NADA, NOTHING packed... that's stressing me out a little bit : ) But then again, I'm too excited to care too much... I know it will get done... probably Friday... yes, I know that's the day we leave, but I think I'm going to take the day off, or at least half day! Anyway, I know this post is pretty pointless... actually all of mine are, but just wanted to post something!