Forgiveness

Did anyone watch Oprah yesterday? I'm not normally a big Oprah fan, but yesterday it got turned on while I made supper and I quickly became absorbed into it. It started out by talking about this wonderful little family of four. It consisted of the two parents (married for, I believe 26 years) and two brothers. It described them as a close family & their house being the house to hang out at for all the neighborhood kids. Sounds like your ideal little American family... It then went into the eldest son was graduating from college and they all went out for a family dinner & his parents gave him a Rolex for his graduation gift they all come home and when they walk in the front door there were 4 shots fired. Each family member was hit by one shot. The eldest boy called 911 saying he had been shot. The mother and youngest son later died at the hospital. The father and eldest son survived. (I promise I'm going somewhere w/ this!). The father, that very night, after learning his wife and son didn't survive, vowed to forgive whoever had done this. WOW. That's a pretty big statement to make when you're amidst a crisis like that. Those are also easy words to say, not as easy to live out. Anyway, to make a long story shorter, come to find out, the eldest son had been the mastermind behind killing his family. That gives me chills just thinking about it. They did not say that he was guilty until about (don't quote me on this) a year after the murders. He lived w/ his father for seven months after it took place. He was arrested and found guilty of both the murders of his mother and brother. Now remember, his father had vowed the very night of the murders to forgive whoever had done this... not knowing it could be his very own son that had plotted and planned and been behind this. I can't imagine and don't really want to how tough that would be on the dad. He said that of course he went through the stages of grief and that he was angry at his son after he found out, but ultimately he was a man of the Lord and he knew that God CALLED HIM to forgive whoever it was, yes, even his son. I just thought this was such a powerful message. I know that we all struggle with forgivness and holding grudges at times and I just think that if this man can forgive his son, who murdered his wife and other son, why should I be mad at the person who cuts me off in traffic or a family member who hurts my feelings... those things are so trivial, even if at the time, it seems like a big deal. This dad was right, God does call us to forgive each other and not to hold grudges. I'm not sure if I'm making a lot of sense in this post... His story just really touched me, b/c I can't imagine if someone murdered my son or my husband how I could forgive the person. He also stated that he didn't forgive him on his own that only w/ God's help was he able to forgive. I think that is where we get off track a lot of times is when we try to solve the problem on our own or take all the hurt and hide it inside ourselves instead of just giving it all to Him, handing it over to God and letting him deal w/ it and asking for His help. I want to be the person who can give it ALL to Him. I know that I want and need and should do this, but I also know that I catch myself pulling certain things back and trying to solve problems on my own. Daily, hourly even I have to remind myself to give things to the Lord. This man is such an awesome example of that. He does have a book, titled "Murder by Family" and his name is Kent Whitaker. His last comment on the show was something like, "I had to forgive him b/c there is freedom in forgiveness. While I'm still here, I have living left to do, and I'm excited about life!" That was such a powerful statement. We never know when our last moment here on Earth so I challenge you, that if you have forgiveness to give to someone, do it today! There was also a statement made on the show about how forgiveness is actually for the person doing the forgiving, it's how they find the freedom they need. It's not about saying you agree or what the person did was right, but it's just about saying you forgive them and you're free of that burden now.